When I was a kid I LOVED going back to school. I loved getting new clothes and school supplies. I loved thinking about all the new books and the new things I would get to do and learn. I loved it all. And to be honest, I still love it all. I devour every piece of paper and note that comes home from school with my kids. I am excited to see what will be happening in their classrooms and what they will be doing and learning. But not everyone is like me. School can be a HUGE source of anxiety for many kids and parents. As your young children start kindergarten and preschool, here are 5 tips for dealing with back to school anxiety.
1. Watch Your Own Behavior
The first tip is to watch your own behavior. Young children are excellent at picking up on nonverbal cues. Focus on the positive aspects of school and the fun that they will be having. If you child is expressing fear or anxiety, reassure them that those feelings are natural and work with them to problem solve those feelings. Allow them to share their feelings and worries. They might even be able to share what would be a comfort to them when they are feeling overwhelmed with school. Be sure to praise brave behavior.
De-stress your morning routine. Do anything you can the night before so that your morning is not frantic and chaotic. Do some research, call the school or the teacher and know what your child should bring for the day and how they should dress. When the child feels prepared they often feel more self-assured.
2. Develop Routines
Children thrive when they have predictability. Did you ever watch how a child will role play the same scene repeatedly or will ask for the same show on TV day after day? Children like to know what is going to happen next. Develop a night time routine and a morning routine to help them be in a relaxed mindset when they head off to school. You could even practice this routine ahead of time.
If you feel your child (or you) might have some separation anxiety, create a special goodbye ritual for you and your child. A great example of this is the Kissing Hand by Audrey Penn. (You can find a review of that book here)
3. Meet Basic Needs
In the 1940’s psychologist Abraham Maslow developed the theory of Hierarchy of Needs. In short, the theory says that in order to reach your full protentional your basic needs of food, water, rest, and warmth must be met. Your Kindergartener is not going to be studying psychology, but they need those basic needs met before they can attempt to deal with a new situation effectively. So get lots of rest and eat a good breakfast and make sure they have a good snack so that they can move beyond the basic level of needs.
4. Get the Teacher Involved
Teachers devote their lives to helping children grown and develop. And all teachers want to see your child succeed. If you are nervous that separation anxiety is going to be an issue for you or your child, talk to the teacher ahead of time. They will likely have tons of tips on how to deal with the situation. Talking to the teacher ahead of time allows them to be on the lookout for signs of anxiety and stress in your child. And if you find yourself with a crying child the first few days of school, ask a teacher for help. Early Education Teachers are trained to help children through this huge adjustment period.
5. Celebrate the Pick-Up
Celebrating the pick-up can be the key to a successful next day at school. Celebrate how brave your child was at school all day. Ask how the day was, what are some good things that happened and what are things that were not so good. When parents are involved and engaged in the child’s education, the student feels better about themselves and is more likely to do better in school. Be sure to tell your child how you did miss them, but how proud you are that they are doing a great job at school
I hope these tips will be helpful in creating a smooth transition into school. Remember, each child is different and will react differently to the new situation that school brings.
